Don’t Litigate, Mediate!

No one likes being in a dispute or a disagreement. It's difficult, frustrating, and can be emotionally draining. However, litigation (going to court) is not always the best way to resolve differences. Another approach is Mediation.

An independent third party helps you come up with a resolution to the situation. You do not have to talk to the other person in the dispute or even be in the same room as them. Mediation is used to resolve all kinds of disputes, from family matters including divorce, to business issues, homeowner association problems, landlord-tenant disagreements, and more.

If you have a situation and you would like to discuss if mediation is a possible approach, please contact us.

Note that mediator cannot give legal or financial advice and we always recommend that you should consult appropriate professionals where necessary for your situation. However, many lawyers these days favor their clients resolving matters outside of a courtroom

Elder Care Mediation and Family Conflict

What do you do when Mom or Dad start forgetting and they need help, but each of your siblings has a different opinion as to what needs to be done?  It is very distressing when you can’t agree.  I know, because I have been there with my Mother (age 80) being diagnosed with Alzheimer’s.  I had no clue as to what I needed to do or where to go for help.  My sister and brother, being out of town, thought that Mom was just fine, but I knew better.

In mediation, all parties can be involved in decision-making, with the mediator as the neutral.  This gives the family the opportunity to get together, express your feelings, share ideas, and connect or re-connect with each other.  Mediation also allows the elder to be involved and to share their own feelings about what is happening to them.  When communication channels are open to all it helps in decision-making.  This also helps the family to plan ahead for any crises that may happen.

Many people deny that Mom or Dad has a problem, because they don’t want to deal with it.  It is definitely a loss — the parent you knew is not there any more.  She is now the child.  You want to give her the dignity she deserves and independence for as long as she is able.

Family conflict mediation provides a forum for communication guided by a trained mediator who encourages friendly conversation rather than adversity.

The key elements of mediation are that it is voluntary, the mediator is neutral, and everything said is confidential.  Mediation allows family members to speak in a protected space that can empower the participants to be truthful and accept expressed opinions, leading them to an acceptable plan of action.

If you are having problems and tensions within your family with regard to an elder it is in everyone’s best interest to try mediation.  You have nothing to lose and a lot to gain.

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